August 3, 2011

Stuck Like Glue


Where do I even begin? I love weddings, really I do. But as a 27 year old, single girl, I have grown to despise them in the last few years. The only great thing about them is seeing my friends so happy. I have had the privilege of being a bridesmaid SEVEN times and they have all been great. This last one was no different. In fact, it was one of my favorites. Everything about being a part of this particular wedding was fun besides one part. Follow along and I'll tell you all about it... 

 One of my dearest friends, Angel, got married about a month ago to one of the most wonderfully nerdy guys I've ever met. He loves Jesus and Angel and I have no doubt they'll be happy together for the rest of their lives. I was very excited when Angel asked me to be a bridesmaid and I figured with all my experience I could be a star helper with some of the preparations. I love doing that stuff... buying reception decorations, making roses out of fondant, cutting out millions of hearts from peacock feathers... that's where I thrive. 

You know what part I hate about being a bridesmaid? The dress... 

In all of my wedding experience I can think of only 2 where I actually liked my dress and felt comfortable in it. Part of the problem is I'm a big girl, and lets just be honest, not everything looks good on a big girl. The other part of the problem is that BRIDESMAID DRESSES ARE UGLY. There are so few that even look good on skinny girls! You know its true, I know its true, we all know its true. The number one way I make it through the awful dress experiences is by repeating over and over to myself, "this is not MY day, no one will be looking at me anyways, all eyes will be on the bride, I will have my day..." 

Hearing of Angel's engagement, learning about the colors, theme, and decorations for the wedding was all so exciting, but my enthusiasm was abruptly thwarted when she called to tell me all the 'maids were meeting at David's Bridal in a couple weeks to find our dresses and get fitted. 

"Two weeks from Friday? That sounds great! I'm so pumped!" I fibbed. 

Now, don't get me wrong, I will do whatever the bride wants and I really do have a great time through the whole wedding planning but the dress part can be awful! So, naturally I wasn't really looking forward to it. 

Angel was a great bride, the anti-bridezilla really. She even let all five of us bridesmaids pick whatever dress we wanted. They didn't have to look alike or anything as long as they were the right color. We were all thrilled about that decision and when "two weeks from Friday" came along we quickly tore through the racks picking this dress and that dress and ran back to the fitting rooms to claim our changing stalls. We were having a great time trying on all different styles and soon the fitting area was full of happy bridesmaids asking each other, "Can you zip this up for me?" and "Will you unzip me please? I gotta try on another!" This went on for about 20 minutes and as one of my fellow bridesmaids quickly zipped me up then scurried off to her stall to try on a her next gown, I turned around and saw the green dress I was wearing in the mirror. I knew right away it was going to be the one I wanted. It was strapless, kelly green, knee length and it had pockets. It was so cute!

We had all tried on at least 7 or 8 dresses at this point, so imagine our surprise when we walked out of our fitting rooms at the exact same moment, wearing the ones we had chosen and they were all the same dress! It was one of those rare, glorious wedding moments where the planets align and you realize this is going to be one of the few planning decisions that is going to come easy. 

Laughter ensued as the realization settled in that we all had on the same dress, and the one time the bride doesn't ask us all to wear the same style, we accidentally choose it anyways. It was really quite funny, and it turned out to be the first of many hilarious memories we all made throughout the months to come preparing for this wedding. 

After we all took a moment and took pictures, we went back into our fitting rooms to change out of our matching dresses. Now, if you re a girl you probably know its much easier to unzip a dress than it is to zip it up. So, as I got in my stall I reached back to unzip my new dress. I pulled the zipper and it got about 2 inches down then... "This isn't happening..." I panicked and said quietly to myself. Another tug... "C'mon you rascally thing!" Nothing... I tried zipping it up.. you know that trick that everyone tries but it rarely ever helps the situation? No movement at all. "Piece of trash, unzip, already!

At this point, my friend in the stall next to me says, "Abby? Umm... are you alright?" I told her no and asked her to please come over and unzip my dress because it was jammed. She giggled and came over to my fitting room after she had finished changing. Now, this coincidentally was the same girl that had zipped my dress up. She pulled on the zipper and nothing... My poor friend tried so hard and could not get it unzipped. Turns out when it was zipped up, the hanger string accidentally got zipped up in the zipper and was NOT coming out. 

So, after being passed around from friend to friend and no one being able to unzip me, we had to call for back up. And by back up I mean, the dress specialists that work at the bridal store. "Wow, this thing is really stuck, huh?" says the specialist, made only more awkward by the nervous laugh she tacked on the end of the statement and the fact that shes not being discreet about my situation at all. So, there I am, standing in the fitting area, mirrors everywhere, girls trying on wedding dresses, making one of the most special decisions of their lives, and I'm in the background with this dress stuck on me and the specialist tugging at the zipper til were both blue in the face. Still, nothing.

Then, just when you think this situation cannot get any worse she suggests the most embarrassing option, "Well, I just cant get it! I think we need to take you to alterations and cut you out."

That's right, cut... me... out. I have never been more embarrassed in my life as I was when she led me through the store to the very back corner and into the alterations department. I felt like I was being prepped for surgery, or like a pig being led to the slaughterhouse. It was absolutely awful. 

Upon entering the alterations room, the seamstress turned me around, snipped the entire zipper out and sent me on my way. The specialist had disappeared as well, leaving me to take the walk of shame all the way back to the fitting rooms on my own. My friends of course, were cracking up. And looking back, it is pretty funny. I mean, leave it to the big girl to get stuck in the bridesmaids dress, right?! Still, as funny as it may be now, at the time it was mortifying. 

That's the kind of thing that could only happen to me. That's the story of my life... That's the Story of Abby. 

P.S. This wedding ended up being the most fun, stress-free wedding I've ever been a part of.  Thanks Angel, Rachel, Haven, Alisha and Randi :)

1 comment:

  1. I can't believe y'all cut hearts out of those feathers! Poor peacocks that had to die for those! Lol